Author: dave

Surfer, Marine Biologist and Technologist = The ingredients of writing the perfect Sci-Fi

THE CALLING IPA

  • TYPE: Double IPA
  • BREWERY: Boulevard Brewing Company
  • LOCATION: Kansas City, MO
  • CONTAINER: 16 oz Can
  • COST: Around 10.99 four pack
  • ABV: 8.50%
  • RATING: 4 Swigs
  • REVIEWED BY: Dave

One Malt, Eight Hops.  What lured me on was the honey-like start, slightly bitter middle, gorgeous color and hoppy hop finish landing me on a square with my feet in a tangle.  I loved this beer so much I went on vacation with it, giving it its own chaise lounge, on the chaise lounge, on the chaise lounge all day long on the chaise lounge – Lyrics and music by Wet Leg (Chaise Longue)

THEIR STORY:  

The Calling is the undeniable IPA we were driven to make.  It’s our tribute to like-minded dreamers, adventurous spirits and glass half-full optimists. Heed your call to enjoy.

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H.A.Z.Y. – I.P.A.

H.A.Z.Y. I.P.A

  • TYPE: Hazy IPA
  • BREWERY: Sweetwater Brewing Company
  • LOCATION: Atlanta, GA
  • CONTAINER: 12 oz Can
  • COST: BOGO – 2 Six packs for $12 @ Publix
  • ABV: 6.20%
  • RATING: 4+ Swigs
  • REVIEWED BY: Dave

During a draught–– my outside garage fridge empty of craft beers––  I hopped into my TACO and drove down to Publix and made a bee-line to craft beer section and saw this Sweetwater H.A.Z.Y.  I.P.A. on BOGO.  I recalled having a Sweetwater in the past but not this one.   At the register where and older cashier with a pleasant smile, attractive, asked if I ever had this one?  I answered no, but mentioned I loved IPA’s.  I then asked her if she ever had this and what she thought of it?  The answer I received took me out there and back: 

“Not someone’s name. Not an album cover nor game of the future involving four or more players dressed in combat complete uniforms carrying magnifying paper cups constructed of glass and more paper then was originally thought necessary. Not all the titles of the beers along the shelves,  aggregated into one big ball made from smaller balls held together by the pain taking care of a fast moving chicken that may have seen, but not contemplated, what the mass of balls was doing in its domain to begin with.  It then made a few chicken noises which culminated into one big gizzard wrenching scream then cautiously crossed its legs and fell over, puffing clouds of dirt through its nostrils and settling into a puddle, to die, in the rain, alone.”

“That works for me,” I said.  “And save the plastic, I can carry these.”

THEIR STORY:  We endowed this straight-up juice-bomb with a double dry hop of mosaic, citra el dorado and azacca fora blast of mango, stone fruit, lime and pine aromas.It’s not a mirage but a tasty refreshing oasis in your pursuit of haziness.

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Apalach IPA

  • TYPE: IPA
  • BREWERY: Oyster City Brewing Company
  • LOCATION: Lakeland, FL
  • CONTAINER: 12 oz Can
  • COST: Around $10/six of cans
  • ABV: 6.9%
  • RATING: 4+ Swigs
  • REVIEWED BY: Dave

So there I was, sitting on the other side of the bar for a change, drinking my Apalach IPA, a no nonsense IPA with mild undertones that don’t reach up and bite you, when in walks a Master Crafter from down the street.  I stop what I’m doing and ask if there is something I could help him with. He looks around the bar, but not at me, clears his throat and says, “What time do you have?”

“Four more swigs before this is a beached whale,” I say glancing at the back of my hand.  Not finding the humor in this he sits down at the corner of the bar like he’s got cenosillicaphobia.

Suddenly, I was being held from behind and my Apalach IPA was out of reach to do me any good. But not being a noob, I hopped my way out of that mash. So there we stood, about to get into it when a growler rolled off the shelf from above and struck him on the head.  That’s the way Ninkasi works–– just when you need her. 

THEIR STORY:  Made By The Water

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JoJo Bean – Coffee Porter

 

  • TYPE: Coffee Porter 
  • BREWERY: 81 Bay Brewing Company
  • LOCATION: Tampa, FL
  • CONTAINER: 12 oz Can
  • COST: Around $10/six of cans
  • ABV: 6%
  • RATING: 4+ Swigs
  • REVIEWED BY: Whav

It was a cold day in Florida–– but let’s put this into perspective––  the temperature dropped to 72F.  I was replacing a boat horn in my Martini Launch which was up on the lift while being pestered by a pair of boat-tailed grackles who decided to build a nest next to one of the lift motors.  I could tell they didn’t like me here by how they sneaked up on me and chatted in my ear.  They were messing with me, but they should have thought about that before building a nest where they did.  I ignored them and wished they would do the same.  I don’t blame them for being persistent because earlier in the day I saw a crow swoop in while they were both away and it plucked a newborn from the nest and stole off.  Stupidly the crow returned for more, but the boat-tails did a number on it, pecking away at it in flight and dropping some fearers in their attack.

I needed some mounting screws and headed back inside, just in time because it began to rain and if you are not familiar with rain at 27.0595° N 80.1364° W, this rain is usually heard before it arrives, often mistaken for the rumble of a distant freight train.  This rain can bend light.  It was also late in the day and the grandfather clock in the hallway struck up a conversation telling me it was five o’clock.  I nodded in reply and headed for the garage stash of local brews.  I looked over the cache and feeling the chill and dampness,  I selected the JoJo Bean Coffee Porter.  It was a perfect selection: Smooth, with hints of chocolate laced up nicely with a brew of Lucky Goat Guatemalan beans.  This is the kind of beer that could drown out a hard rain.

 

THEIR STORY:  Beer for people who love beer.

 

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FREEDOM IPA

  • TYPE: IPA
  • BREWERY: Tequesta Brewing Co. (TBC)
  • LOCATION: Tequesta, FL
  • CONTAINER: 12 oz Can
  • COST: $5 Pint (on tap) My friend picked up this six for me as a gift.  My guess, between $12-$14 per six pack
  • ABV: 6.6 %
  • RATING: 4+ Swigs
  • REVIEWED BY: Dave

This is the kind of beer other IPAS dream of being…. a no-nonsense IPA–– that’s it. Bitterness to the dying end.  An IPA for IPA Purists. 

I have spent many hours at TBC, which I consider an extension of my living room.  This cozy cool place feels like a pair of your favorite jeans and the craft beer they make is second to no one.   I have kept my mouth shut until now on this place, but their story needs to be told and this review is going to make me get there an hour earlier than usual to secure a place at the bar. But now I’m just wondering… do they open at seven AM?

THEIR STORY:  India Pale Ale bursting with tropical citrus bitterness.  A beer that screams FREEDOM!  ‘MERICA!

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Hyper Beam

 

  • TYPE: IPA
  • BREWERY: Sixpoint Brewery
  • LOCATION: Brooklyn, NY
  • CONTAINER: 12 oz Can
  • COST: $12.48 six pack of cans, etc.
  • ABV: 8.0 %
  • RATING: 5 Swigs
  • REVIEWED BY: Dave

I’ve been here before… wait a minute.  Could this be some mud dauber wasp memory DNA thing?  A thing people confuse with Deja vu?  And the reason they keep going back to the packy for the same thing, but slightly different from the first?  

This is my third try at SixPoint’s products in the “Loop”.  Something Simon Stalenhag would be proud of. Not the kind of beer you can drink all night–– no… it’s way to good for that.  It’s the kind of beer you start the night with, sitting down, reading Tales From The Loop, because anything after this, even itself, will not have the memory flashes of the first.  But I want one each and every day, because every day should be Christmas.

 

THEIR STORY:  Beer is culture. The Infinite LOOP is a series of IPAS in a never-ending reotation inspired by by our small batch inovations. 

This is an extremely powerful move.An incredibly potent shock.An immense blast of tropical wavelengths. INSANE amounts of guava and passionfruit flavors BLAST the tastebuds. You’vebeen targeted by a powerful beam… Can you feel the passion… in the air right now?  We sure do.  Take a big gulp. It’s very effective.

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Goon Squad

 

  • TYPE: Juicy Hazy Double IPA
  • BREWERY: Brew Hub
  • LOCATION: Lakeland, FL
  • CONTAINER: 12 oz Can
  • COST: $10.48 – six pack of cans
  • ABV: 9.8 %
  • RATING: 5 Swigs
  • REVIEWED BY: Dave

One more terrific Florida beer with strong citrus flavors and a smooth taste–– start to finish.  I bought this on a hunch, but maybe it was planned that way, eye level on the shelf, bright orange can and a name on it I couldn’t resist.

After a can or two of this, I found myself walking through a door into the hazy air left behind by cigar smoke and sitting down across from a guy with worn shoes up on the desk and a straw porkpie hat dipped down to cover an equally hazy eye.

“How’d you get my name?” He asked.

“I didn’t.” I replied.

“Then what are you doing here?”

“I got into a fight with the Pillsbury Doughboy, isle seven, in the Winn-Dixie, Hobe Sound.  I read the label on the package he was pushing, about a recipe maybe you wrote up.”  I stopped there to let that bake for a second or two.

He tilted his chin up to get a better look at me, his one eye scanning, the other stationary as if watching the timer on the wall.  He nodded for me to continue.

“This beer I keep seeing on the shelf–– Goon Squad–– ever hear of it?” I asked

“Yeah.” His chin titling down again.

“How do you think that would pair with your recipe for Apple Fruity Pull-Apart Bread.”

He pulled his feet off the desk and leaned into me.  “Where did you hear that?” I could tell from his question, he wanted an answer.

“Doughboy… after I had him stretched out on the floor.”

“Yeah… okay,” he said leaning back, beads of sweat appearing just above the lip.  “Yeah.  It will pair just fine.”

Nothing more needed to be said, I got up and started to leave.

“Tell Doughboy I’ll be looking for him,” he added.

I nodded and left.

 

THEIR STORY:  There was no story associated with this one on their can, but maybe the only one needed is mine.

 

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Tocobaga – Red India Pales Ale

  • TYPE: Tocobaga Red India Pale Ale
  • BREWERY: Cigar City Brewing Company
  • LOCATION: Tampa, FL
  • CONTAINER: 12 oz Can
  • COST: Total Wine – $9.99 six pack of cans
  • ABV: 7.2%
  • RATING: 5Swigs
  • REVIEWED BY: Dave

Couldn’t it be that something happen something be that it couldn’t . I seem to remember having this beer but it’s that feeling of isomerism… then I realized it was from one of my favorite Florida brewing companies, Cigar City.  Gee wiz they make a good brew.  Just as I was about to place my can of Tocobaga down by the edge of the pool,  two copper lizards and a cicada flew down next to it, recognizing this is indeed is a great brew.    From the first pull, its smooth yet rich flavor grabs you, bypassing the bitterness you would expect from an IPA…. you want more and before you know it it’s gone and all you can remember is—wow.. this could be my everyday brew.

THEIR STORY:  Brimming with Citrus hops, our Red IPA tempers it’s bitterness with rich malt flavors reminiscent with carmel and bread crust.  Notes of blueberry and pine round out this assertive yet balanced ale.

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BIMINI TWIST IPA

  • TYPE:  IPA
  • BREWERY: 3 Daughters Brewing
  • LOCATION: St. Petersburg, FL
  • CONTAINER: 12 oz Can
  • COST: UKNOWN – had it at a friend’s house.
  • ABV: 7.0%
  • RATING: 4 Swigs
  • REVIEWED BY: Dave

     “Bombora, starboard bow! Come about, Lad! 

     “The agreement we made, of this venue, was that I would be paid the balance in total of …. 32 DASH, minus the dancing….” said the Lad

The captain, spun around as if to bore through the deck with his Boring Company promotional Not-A-Flame-Thrower. 

   “Say again, Lad?”

    This is where the captain’s parrot, Judy,  barreled through the hatch doors with the top board almost cleaving it in half.  Judy looked back at the near miss and fluffed up a bit… annoyed… that she did not see that coming.

    “I am most dissatisfied with the standing water situation below,” Judy interrupted.  “What progress have you made? Show me your top five bids.”

     Both the captain and the Lad looked disinterested.

     Judy, irritated by their dismissal, flew above the Captain and Lad trying to land deposits onto them.  The captain saw a splat land by his prized penny loafers, looked up, and could make out the silhouette of Judy against the sun.  He pulled out his caterpillar minnow net gun, pointed it toward the sky and fired as he shielded his eyes. He heard a squawk followed by a thud on the deck.  Fortunately for Judy, she landed on a pile of coiled ropes breaking her fall and also fortunately, before joining the crew of the Bombora, she was a training instructor at, HowToGetOutOfNetsOnRopes dot com.  

      The Lad, not known for much of anything, had gone below during this ruckus and removed three cans of Bimini Twist from the galley fridge and by the time he got back up on deck, the Captain and Judy were about to go at it–Judy swinging a spiked mace while the Captain took more modern methods and was slapping in a duct taped pair of magazines into his AR-15. 

 

     “Hold on there you two!” the Lad shouted.  “Try one of these, first.”  

     Judy, skeptical and squinting into the sun, dropped the mace to the deck and reached for the Bimini, the Captain doing the same.

   “Very smooth start with hops coming in strong,” the Captain stated.

   “Dry tart finish.  Although I could not sense the citrus, I could feel the 7.0% ABV creeping up on me… “ Judy added.  “Nice IBU rating– Everything I like in an IPA.”

    “There, now isn’t that better than fighting to the death?” said the Lad.

    “Well…. For now,” remarked Judy.

    “And you, Captain?” the Lad encouraged.”

    The Captain took another swig from the Bimini, as the condensation from the hot humid tropical heat beaded up on his forehead. “Not bad my Lad.  I hope you stocked up on these? I’d hate to see parts of Judy scattered along the deck.”

    “You and what army?” Chided Judy, bringing the three of them to a hearty laugh with their Bimini’s raised above their heads.    

THEIR STORY: Our perfect IPA: Intense citrus and floral hop aroma coupled with slight hints of citrus make this beer as refreshing as a Bimini sea breeze. Don’t let this one get away.

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Three Wise Guys

 

  • TYPE: coffee Porter
  • BREWERY: Persimmon Hollow Brewing Company
  • LOCATION: DeLand, Fl
  • CONTAINER: 12 oz Can
  • COST: $12.49 per 12oz 6 pack
  • ABV: 7.5%
  • RATING: 5 Swigs
  • REVIEWED BY: Dave

For some reason, I compressed the coffee more than usual in the custom filter of my coffee machine–– I was getting bored with my usual brew. I pressed the start icon on the machine and it started to hiss and wobble,  steam spitting out the sides and the lights began to flicker and I was hit with a distorted ripple in the air that pushed me back against the kitchen island, hitting my head and sliding down to the floor. When I came to, everything seemed to be where it was, except where my coffee mug usually sat beneath the drip, there was a Three Wise Guys Porter in its place. What the heck… man the coffee came through beautifully in this silky smooth porter base. Wow. I love this stuff.

 

THEIR STORY: I’ll make him a beer he can’t refuse.

 

 

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